Luke 22:54 “Then seizing him, they led him away and took him into the house of the high priest. Peter followed at a distance.”
A few years ago I was out with some friends trying my hand at country western dancing. First of all the word dancing and my personal name have never been used in the same sentence before in my lifetime, so it was bound to be a night to remember. As the group was sitting there, they began making fun of a few folks on the dance floor based on what they were wearing. You could tell these individuals didn’t have much money and were doing the best with what they had. Still the group I was with kept going on with comments about them. Never within their earshot, but still it kept happening. I sat there a while not really having much fun, when a thought entered my mind and out of my mouth I blurted a similar comment about one of these individuals and had my group rolling on the floor. Right after I made the comment it hit me, “Yes you are fitting in nicely aren’t you!?” Yes I was, but it just didn’t feel right inside. I felt like scum.
I was getting wrapped up in the moment. I was enjoying fitting into the crowd and found myself starting to get pulled into what I considered some unacceptable behaviors on my part. It was a weird situation. I wanted to have fun, but I also didn’t want to be the downer in the group as well.
I’ve thought of many other instances since then where I’m pretty clear on my beliefs spiritually around others but find that there are times when I seem to turn the Peter button on and start following Jesus at a distance. Keep him close enough to say I’m with Him but not close enough to where I don’t have to get caught up in the attention He tends to draw.
When I read Luke 22, it is that section in verse 54 that says “Peter followed him at a distance” that really gets to me. He wanted and needed to be close to Jesus, but not close enough to want to be identified with Him even in the toughest of times. We have no idea what brought Peter to this point. Could it have been Jesus rebuke of him when he pulled a sword out and attacked the guard trying to protect Jesus in the Garden? Or maybe it was the peer pressure of those around him identifying him as one of Jesus disciples. We don’t know. All we do know is he needed to be near Jesus, but not close enough to Him to be identified with Him.
I have to confess that looking back over my life, I took the follow Him at a distance position. Even today, I find that daily I tend to have many situations where I am given this same choice. Whether it be a business situation, interacting with contractors at my house, or with friends. Daily I’m given the chance to say, am I walking with Jesus or am I following Him at a distance. Never am I saying I don’t want Him in my life. It’s deciding whether I want Him in my heart or my back pocket.
No matter where we are at in our lives, Jesus knows exactly where our hearts are at. In verses 60 and 61 right as Peter goes through his third denial of Jesus, he looks up and there is Jesus looking him straight in the eye across the fire! No matter where we are in our walk with Jesus, whether it is with Him or following Him from a distance, He knows where we are and the motives behind our choices and actions. It takes courage to make the decision, “Yes, I am with Him!” It takes fear to say, “No, I think I’ll follow Him at a distance.”
Father, forgive me for too many times in my life making the decision of following you at a distance verses deciding to stand with you in the moment.
Randy, thanks for these insights. It is so easy to be sucked in to fitting in that we forget who we are and that people matter to God and they should matter to us.
You are right John, That need to belong and fit in is so subtle that you are not even aware of what you give up at times when you give into its pull. Appreciate your comments. Hope you and Janie are doing well.